Thursday, July 19, 2012

Edisto Beach

I'm back!

If you're thinking what I'm thinking, then you're thinking this blog might be a bust. But NAY, I will keep trying. Hopefully sometime soon my life this blog will start to take shape, and have a clear direction.

Recently, as I have every 4th of July since utero (sick), my entire family vacationed for a week at Edisto Beach, SC. Actually, no, my birthday is in April, I couldn't have been in utero because it's...9...months..from the 4th of July. sick.

July 1986: dad, yours truly, and laura's forehead.
Admitting that I was actually conceived is probably one of the hardest things I'll ever not do.

This is what Rudy looked like the entire ride down. Needless to say, I was almost the cause of no less than 7 car accidents as I stalked him in the rear view mirror.
dead.
Anyhoot. Edisto is great. Though it's not the place for everyone. In fact, it's rare that I come across anyone who has actually heard of it--and when I do, the reviews are often less than stellar due to it's lack of restaurants/bars/anything entertaining beyond my immediate gene pool and/or someone my dad went to the Citadel with. But to me, it's really a delight.

photo by Dave Allen, Edisto Island 

In general, the majority of the population seems to be over 60, and the portion of said population occupying the actual beach is over 250 lbs. Which just so happens to be my sweet spot, bathing-suit-beach-bodily speaking.

Every year, it seems that more and more babies are popping up and attending this vacay. Circle of life, y'all. I love babies, and I kind of think they make the beach even more awesome. Well, maybe not 1-day-old ones that can’t really move or not cry. Or ones that scream. And especially not ones that throw cheetos or any other consumable item to sea gulls anywhere near my 25’ preferred beach isolation radius. Incidentally, I also happen to have a mission to expose J to as many non-terrifying ones as possible, so that one day, (circa 2034) I’ll be able to convince him to let me reproduce (beyond tiny baby rudy frenchies).

Although it probably comes as no surprise, babies related to me are effing cute. Like, people have gone to jail for being less obsessed with babies cute.  exhibits 1-4:

nephew, Holmes and dad, and an oreo

son, Rudy.
cousin's son, Louis, photo via Stevie

Louis, Edisto Serpentarium, via Stevie
*The Edisto Serpentarium is a pretty legit place, especially for little kids, but it does rival as one of the most frightening experiences of my life, as I found myself face to face with MANY snakes, uncaged, and inches from killer crocs, possibly alligators..I couldn't stop crying long enough to analyze the subtle differences in species. Looks like a croc here though. Also, the smell of the interior spaces rouse memories of my dead pet hermit crabs' carcasses--and I'm really not just being dramatic here, it was terrible.

Anyway, not a lot goes down at Edisto, (clearly, if I was hanging out at a serpentarium), outside of the occasional dolphin sighting, which, depending on it's proximity, I either gasp at in awe of it's mystical majesty or PANIC and vomit in the water. (I'll save a post recalling stories of my dad forcing my sister and I to water ski in low-country inlets alongside these beasts for a later date). But, as always, the week was a dream, and I already desperately miss my sisters and cousins and those careless days without a thing to do but read 50 Shades of Grey (later post!) and gush about how cute Rudy looks in a life vest. *Note, this accessory was not worn as successfully as hoped, and due to an aggressive amount of thrashing while donning it, there is sadly, very little photo documentation.

Coming up...this weekend J and I are headed to the firefly music festival in Delaware for 3 days. Which can quite literally only be described as his HEAVEN on earth, and potentially my hell. I'll let you know how it all goes down when we return.

Laters. (50 shades of grey readers, see what I did there?!?)